Friday, March 19, 2010

guest blogger: The Southern Belle Baby

so my final guest blogger is Jessica from The Southern Belle Baby. i feel like i've "known" her forever when in fact it's only been a couple years.

i "met" her on thenest & i immediately liked her. she was pretty gung ho on getting ku and when it didn't happen right away- instead of FREAKING OUT & ASKING HER DOCTOR FOR CLOMID- she took the steps to find out what the "issue" might be. as someone else who has struggled with infertility, i was imediately in love.

she's funny, pretty, smart, has a cute kid- etc etc etc. the list goes on.

so here she is folks:

Sexual Evolution

When I first got with my now-husband, we were both virgins.

Yes, I know, how sweet, right? He was 20 and I was 17. We were off and on until I was 18, but then were officially together. We couldn’t keep our hands off of each other, and each kiss made you feel like your crotch would absolutely burst into flames. We messed around everywhere we possibly could. On the couch. On the floor. In his truck (be careful, by the way, getting felt up in a truck in your driveway. You just may get so hot and bothered that it escapes your attention that your boob is still hanging out and when you go back inside, your little brother may see it and be scarred for life. True story).

After this initial "ohmygodyouresohotpleaseletmehaveit" phase, it’s no surprise that our will power waned and we did it. You know… IT. I cooked him a fancy dinner, which probably wasn’t the best idea since we were both incredibly full and I spent the following hours sucking in my stomach, but afterwards, things got hot and heavy. It lasted a whole glorious 15 seconds, but it was done, and after that, there was no stopping us.

When you first have sex, you become addicted. It’s a cool new thing that you’ve never done before, and hey, it feels great. So, we did it all the time and everywhere we could. We knew no boundaries; no position was off limits, no sexual act was too brazen.

This lasted for about a week.

Then my dear Trevor decided that we were too into the physical. Whatever, dude, I like the physical, and aren’t you supposed to be doing nothing but thinking about sex at age 20? Then it happened. I became a nympho. When someone withholds something from you, that thing becomes that much more desirable. I was being denied, and to this day, I don’t exactly understand why. It was some weird phase, I guess, but I was about 347 times hornier than my boyfriend. It was an effing tragedy. I pounced on him all the time, trying to make

out or initiate any kind of sexual activity. Oh so sad.

Through our entire relationship, I have been the instigator of sex. I’d say 75% of the time, it was all on me.

This continued when we got married, and especially when we were trying to get pregnant.

Although to his credit, that was very mechanical, planned sex dictated by my fertility chart and ovulation sticks- not exactly room for deviation!

Once I got pregnant after dealing with infertility, I refused to have sex for a good while. It was a pretty “dry” pregnancy for old Trevor, if you catch my drift.

Now, eight weeks after our son’s birth, something has happened.

The tide has turned… my husband is a man obsessed. Every day, I will sit down to do something of importance once Knox is finally asleep, and like clockwork, Trevor gives me a wink, hands me a glass of wine or makes some suggestive gesture. I look at him like he’s on crack- why would I want to have sex when I finally have five minutes in which to take a shower? Or unload the dishwasher? Or pay the bills? How horribly ironic. Now that I don’t care about sex at all, he wants it all the time.

So now I know the secret to making your man weak in the knees and an absolute slave to your every whim: lose your sex drive completely. So sad.

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Britt said...

I'm with you sister! I love how honest you are! I wish I could get some of my sex drive back but no such luck... yet.

Eliza said...

Ugh, me too. We're working on it though, and it seems to be getting better.

Jenn said...

Oh my I wish I had that problem! I am back to being the hornball once again! LOL