birth story

after my 41 week 1 day appt on wed 23rd my OB decided that i def had progressed some- i think i was at a 2 or something- anyways, so she said i could wait until 42 weeks (um, i think not)or i could come in the next day for an induction (sounds like a plan)

so on thurs 24th @ 41 weeks 2 days i checked into the hospital @ 7:30am. after the nurse butchered my hands (for the IV) they started me on pitocin at 8:30am (after doing another internal)- they upped my dose every 30 min & monitored me for 20-30 min stretches. when i wasn't being monitored i was walking around to keep things "moving"

i had very managable contractions after a few hours on the pitocin & when my OB checked me around 2ish she said i was at 4cm and my cervix was very thinned out and etc etc. wonderful! she offered the epidural then but i held off because i really wasn't in any pain.

well about 2 hours later i was at 5 1/2 cm & the contractions were starting to hurt quite a bit so i decided to get the epidural while i could still sit still. after 2 tries (and a few tears) the epidural was in and they started the medicine...oh my GOD! i don't know how women go without it- God bless them! that stuff is GOLD!

anyway- so that was around 4:30ish and i sat in bed & labored away. it was so nice not to be in pain- the only thing i could complain about was the fact that i was STARVING!!! it eventually made me pretty nauseous so they gave me some zofran. wonderful!

my OB broke my water around 6:30ish and that seemed to get things moving even more.
i napped a bit & around 10:15ish she checked me again & said i was completely dialated and ready. she gave me about 30 min to "get ready" (ie: empty my bladder with the help of a catheter) and i started pushing- after 45 min, out she came! it was so...awesome/weird/surreal. i got to watch with the mirror and the husband got to hold my leg & watch as well.

alexis praise came out screaming at 11:22pm at a hefty 8lbs 3oz & 21 1/2in long- and that was AFTER she had pooped 3 times! they put her on my chest as they cleaned her up a bit & i started bawling. she was so perfect. ::squee::

seriously- TONS of hair and long, long fingers & toes. her hair was the talk of the ward ;)

anywho- after a bit the husband cut the cord & they took her off to do their thing. i delivered the placenta & my OB took a look. at first she thought there were no tears but then she found a small one & i got 2 stiches. i had some "vaginal abrasions" but otherwise i was good to go.
after she was done the nurse cathed me again & got me cleaned up. i couldn't walk yet so she wheeled me to the nursery to take a look- alex was pinking up nicely & sound asleep. so they wheeled me to my room and showed me how to take care of "things" down there.

they brought her in about an hour later and showed me how to nurse- she's not so great at latching on and she's a bit of a lazy eater so it was interesting. eventually she did eat & continued to do so until we left the hospital on sat.

we're home now & while the first night was HELL, last night was much better (thank you sleep incliner & swaddle me blanket)

my milk came in this morning around 4:30am (ouch & wet) but she still won't latch on & stay- so i pumped this morning & it was sweet relief! i also fed her with a bottle & i could have cried because the poor thing finally got some food in her. yay!

so that's that! probably more info than you want or need but hey :)
i'd do it all again in a heartbeat- OH, and take EVERYTHING the hospital provides. those mesh undies, pads, tucks, dermoplast are freaking heaven!!!

and here's my little lady:

i'm so in love. freaking crazy!

induction scheduled

41 weeks 1 day = 3cm dialated! it also = a happy/healthy/huge (8+ lb) baby. good God.
so i'm set to be induced tomorrow @ 7:30am. so hopefully alex will be here sometime tomorrow- and by friday at the latest!

yay!!! i'll be sure to update as soon as everything goes down.

i must say i'm a bit scared-i had a very quick internal today and it killed- ummm, how the hell am i going to labor?! aaaaiiieeee!

freezer meals/puppies

this is how cessna rolls while "watching" football:


heh- she's adorable.

and here is what i have so far:

shepard's pie, macaroni & cheese & cheesy cous cous with chicken. nom

aaaaand WAY to many chocolate chip cookies.

i'm trying to figure out what else to make- i'm so freaking BORED so all i can do is cook/bake/cook/bake otherwise i'll just spend money. i'm trying to avoid that.

41 weeks

as you can see- she's still pretty high. i mean, i don't see much droppage at ALL! giiiiiirl!

i also "touched" up these photos to save you all the horror of my stretch marks. you're welcome!

i have an appt tomorrow (NST & an U/S) and we'll go from there to see when we get to meet miss Alex....i'm getting soooo ancy now! my co-worker (who was due a month after me) had her baby today. wtf?! jealous!!!!

status report

ZERO DIALATION!!!! ZERO ANYTHING!!!!

that's what's going on down under. i must admit, i'm really bummed. i don't think i realized how ready i was until the chance that something might be going on was taken away. ugh.

my internal exam wasn't terrible- but it wasn't pleasant either, i mean seriously, it felt like he was trying to reach my tonsils. at one point i literally screamed out DAMNIT!!!! and he apologized profusely, however, it could have been worse. it was mainly very, very uncomfortable.

anyways- he informed me that my cervix is nice & soft, but my inner cervix is like a fortress. like, he couldn't get his finger in there at all. closed up tight. like fort knox. gaaaaah.

so- he instructed me to come in next tues (9/22) for an NST & Ultrasound. so i go to schedule and guess what? they have nothing avail on tues. and i almost lose it. like, i had to take a minute to compose myself before i could speak to the checkout girl. a tear did manage to escape but i hid it well.

so- i have to go to the hospital on wed instead for the U/S an then to the office for the NST. freaking great.
i get my paperwork- walk out the door & start BAWLING! like, wtf?! i was just so bummmmmed. mainly because my OB said if everything looks good next week then they might not even try to take her until the following week...WHAT!? NO! i CANNOT wait that long!!!! argh.

so i cried myself home and decided i just need to suck it up. it's not like i can do anything, you know? and it really doesn't matter as long as she's ok- but i also worry about that. how long can she possibly be ok in there?! gosh.
i have to laugh too because i guess after an internal "normal" women are supposed to have a bloody show of sorts- yeah, not here! i had some weird "stuff" make an exit but no cramping or anything. aaawesome.

ah well- at least i found these ADORABLE doxie pieces at Gymboree this afternoon- on sale too!

::squee:: right? i'm pumped!

so that's that. at least i decided to be "done" with work- i can only imagine people's faces if i were to show up. meh.

a day of first & lasts

Firsts:
at 4:20pm i will experience my first internal exam. needless to say, i am not looking forward to it. in fact, i'm still trying to figure out how my OB's hand is going to fit inside of, what i consider, a rather small opening. dear God.

regardless of everything i've been through to get to here- i am still not a fan of having my privates violated by the men & women OB's & RE's of the New England area- just sayin.

i blame this all on my child for being late- seriously.

Lasts:
today will be my last day of work- whoa now! i said i'd work up until i delivered, and i've tried. the problem is that since Alex doesn't see the need for punctuality, i am forced to make a decision to make the lives of my co-workers easier. why should they have to wait & wonder what day i'm not coming in? why should my unfinished work have to be pawned off on them? it's easier if i just pick a day, make it my last & go. so that day is today.

they're going to "take her by force" at some point next week anyway- so i figure this is close enough.
everyone is very sad, of course, because i'm pretty awesome (for realz) but i shall return & they are aware of this.

Realization:
i still don't have a diaper bag. damn me & my indecisiveness. i want something modern, adorable (but not too adorable), green (but not too much green) , big (but more like medium)- etc etc etc. how can one person make such a decision?!

oh, and if one more person says "No baby yet?!" i might snap. seriously- i never realized how annoying those 3 words could be. i SWEAR to never ask a pregnant lady that question. for real.

40 weeks- due date!

40 weeks- here's the reality people:


dropped? hmmm, some!

bare- notice anything?

yes- that there is the evilness of stretch marks :(




a little closer- there goes my modeling days...let's see Bio Oil fix this.



not so bad from this angle though- nice!

so there! :)

stroller- check

so we finally have our bumbleride stroller:

it came in on friday & i made the husband set it up pronto- aaand i love it! it's so freaking cute! the colors are perfect & its lightweight & rolls with ease. LOVE!

and because i don't want this $$$ work of art to get ruined by my daughter's poop, pee, vom- etc etc- i also ordered a custom Stroller Liner from this seller on etsy- i ordered it in the Owls Cream fabric with the Green Minky backing. i can't wait to get it!

in other news- Alex is "supposed" to come out tomorrow. but i have a feeling that i'll be exactely where i am right now at this time tomorrow- at work. boooo. so now i have to deal with co-workers stopping by my desk every 5 minutes to 1. see if i'm here, 2. give me "tips" etc etc. super.

dreams

last night i dreamt that i lost my mucus plug- it was very vivid and weird. basically when it fell out into the toilet it looked like a red & white jelly fish & then it "came alive" & started floating away.

then more "stuff" came out that looked like green underwater stuff- like seaweed & fish & etc.

wtf!? basically my brain equates "mucus plug" with "under the sea". i need help.

anyway- i woke up, peed & walla- no jellyfish or mermaids- just pee. damn.

bittersweet

so i'm sitting here at my desk & trying to figure out what body part i'm seeing move around inside me. i poke & feel at it, trying to figure it out- but she whips it away and starts doing God knows what in there. it's actually quite hilarious.

and then i get sad. it's so weird. i'm REALLY excited to meet her! i am, i want to see what she looks like, sounds like, smells like- all that jazz. but i'm also really sad that i'm not going to have her with me all day every day anymore. like seriously- i'm tearing up just thinking about it.

i love bringing her to work, shopping, the bathroom, cooking- EVERYWHERE! i love knowing that she's with me & that she's safe. i love talking & having her start moving. i love it when i poke at her & she pokes back- i love it all. and i'm going to miss that. i know i'll have her with me, but it's not the same.

it's like the begining of the "end". she's born & she starts growing up & up & up- and eventually she's going to be a big girl and go off to school, camp, clubs, driving, college, her own family- etc etc. oh my- i don't even want to think about it!!!

so for now, for these last few days, i'm going to really treasure every moment she's still inside me. not that i haven't been treasuring it already- but it's really hit me that sometime within the next 2 weeks (hopefully) she'll no longer be all mine & i'm going to have to share her with the world. i don't think i'm ready for that!!

seriously- i'm the most un-emotional, detached, not so very loving person you might ever meet. i'm nice enough, but i'm not very lovey dovey AT ALL. i'm sure people ask my husband all that time why he married me! poor guy.
but i'm so different when it comes to alex- who would have thought that this little person inside of me could change all that?! i haven't even met her yet & i love her more than anything in the world (cept for Jesus- der). and she makes me want to be a better person & do really nice things...AAAH!

i don't even know how to thank God for allowing me to be her mother. what an awesome gift- it's the BEST gift EVER (even better than the Maroon 5 tickets the husband got me for my 21st b-day when i was like OBSESSED with them) for real.

39 weeks = 7 days left

wow- i'm due in 7 days. that = 1 week. jeeze.

now of course she may decide to take her sweet time & not come till God knows when- but still! when i got my BFP, Sept 15th seemed sooooo faaaar awaaaay. i remember marking it on my Outlook Calendar at work and thinking- "wow, that's like, forever!" and now it's here. nuts.

anywho. i did alot of walking, errands, etc etc etc to see if i could move things along this weekend. aaand nothing. not even a cramp- just me being tired and achey. nice. i have an appt this fri. so we'll see where things are at then.

in other news- apparently my mother & mother in in law think they're going to be at our house everyday for the first couple weeks after alex gets here. they "discussed" this & decided it would be best. hmmm, really? when were you planning on including me in this decision?
you should have see the look on the husband's face when my mother made us aware of this "plan"- HA! priceless.

i know i'm going to be tired & i know i'm going to want help- but the first 2 weeks belong to the husband and i. i'll take all the help they want to give after that, GLADLY- but the first 2 weeks are a no go.

i'll make them aware of this after i birth this child- no use getting into it before hand.

what else: this weekend the pipes that carry the water for our humble abode, decided to act up. and by act up i mean drain into the basement. it was fabulous. thankfully after much cussing & prayers (i know, these 2 things shouldn't go hand in hand) the husband managed to snake out the problem & everything is copacetic. the fear of not having a toilet nearly paralyzed me. i kid you not.

let's see: i got a few more baby items from H&M & Target (hello .98 cent onsies!) and the man finally sucked it up and bought a new Keurig because our old one (that lasted us an amazing OVER 4 years) broke. RIP but welcome new, snazzier looking Keurig machine.

and now we wait.

suprise ultrasound

i was quite pleased yesterday when my OB got a weird look on her face after listening to alex's heartbeat & feeling for her head- why you ask? because she was SO sure she was head down but then...wait...what? maybe she's not?

well what ever shall we do now? ahhh, ultrasound! wooooopie!
so we made our way to the u/s room & took a gander. miss alex IS still head down & quite comfy- she's also adorable and moving around like it's going out of style. so everyone was happy- except for alex who seemed rather annoyed that we were bothering her. she'll have to get used to that. anywho.

so i skipped out of my appt & off to WalMart to buy some of this "miracle" stuff:

Bio-Oil. supposedly it greatly aids in diminishing the appearance of stretch marks. this is all i need to hear- so i plunked down $18.95 for a 4.2 oz bottle (along with an addtl $2.96 for Snickers Ice Cream Bars) and hurried home to slather it on.

it smells rather nice & isn't oily in the least- so i approve. thankfully my "gifts" from mother nature aren't fierce & red looking- but they're still there. so i will dutifully apply this stuff 2 times a day for a minimum of 3 months & see where it gets me.

will i ever get a call asking me to appear clad in not but a string bikini on the cover of Self magazine? no, probably not- but still. we shall see.

the night ended with a tummy full of soup, breadsticks & dessert from the Olive Garden (muchos gracious to the husband for this)- and many newly learned survival skills from Bear Grylls.

i feel quite prepared to stay alive if i ever end up in the middle of the desert or rainforest.

...i just need to make sure i bring my Bio Oil so while i'm "surviving" i can also be "diminishing"- der.

things

today: 38 weeks
next appt: Wed Sept 2nd
stroller: will be shipped on Thurs Sept 3rd (jeeze Bumbleride, finally)
money: huge (VERY UNEXPECTED) bonus from work = credit card paid off. AMEN!
nursery: done (finally)
clothing: she has enough...i think
day off: Sept 7th (yay labor day)
STD/FMLA paperwork: ummm- suck. i'm confused.
stretch marks: still evil ::glare::
weight: down a pound (..how?!)
baby: very comfy up in my ute
puppies: trying to claim the glider
kitties: trying to claim the crib & changing table
husband: still expecting me to make him dinner- wtf dude?!
movies: District 9 was awesome. go see it- i love adorable aliens
new moon: 80 days ::squee::
3 Musketeers: omg- why am i eating these like it's going out of style?!

just in case anyone was interested. that's whats up.