this is usually after i've presented the hostess with a plate of cookies or a loaf of bread.
i reply with a
and it's true. i have no idea how i get things done.
people, i. am. tired. so very tired 75% of the time.
i work full time. i have kids. i have a husband. i have friends & family. i have things to cook & cakes to bake. i have promises to keep. i have to clean the house. i have to do laundry & clean up after animals. and somewhere in there i have to sleep- but only a little.
and recently i've added on taking pictures of people. other people. other people who may or may not be aware of all of the things i have going on, but it doesn't matter because if i want to legitimize myself as a photographer then i need to get pictures edited. like now- not 2 weeks from now.
sometimes i collapse on the couch & exclaim to the husband- "oh my God. i'm so TIRED!"
and then i pop up because the timer on the stove goes off & i need to check cupcakes.
then i sit back down. then i get back up because brynn is crying. then i intend to go sit back down but i hear the dryer bell go off & i know that if i don't fold those clothes right now then i'm never going to.
so i fold the clothing. by then the cupcakes are cool & they have to be frosted. but look at the clock- it's 8:30. son of a...whatever.
i frost them. it's 9. wait- the load in the washer is done- into the dryer.
crap- i need to defrost breastmilk & fill brynn's bottles. oh yes- and alex's "juice" & milk cups.
i should also cook that hamburger for tomorrow's dinner.
it's 9:30. hmm- i really need to edit a few more pictures for a client.
ok- i'll edit like 2 or 3 & call it a night.
i look up with glazed over Photoshop eyes- 10:30. crap again. the dryer is done- but that's ok. i'll pull the clothes out & thank GOD KB will fold them tomorrow...i have time to edit 1 more picture.
11:15. i have to be up in 6 hours. i should go to bed. the husband is already in bed.
i turn off lights & notice that the milk is now de-thawed. i REALLY need to get those bottles filled & into the fridge. and look at that- dishes on the counter. i should wash them now so i don't have to do them in the morning...
11:45. bottles filled. cups filled. dishes washed. lunches ready for tomorrow. living room picked up. clothes sitting in the laundry basket. computer on Sleep. doors locked. my clothes set out. teeth brushed. face washed. sleeping children checked on. bed? yes.
12:30. i fall asleep thinking about all the crap i have to do tomorrow. and the next day. and lets not even think about this weekend.
the husband always tells me i need to "sit down & relax."
this actually annoys me because it's usually when i'm doing something that doesn't have the option to not get finished.
laundry. lunches. dinner. bathing the girls. etc etc.
i get snippy & say, "well if i don't do it who will? you?"
he usually rolls his eyes & tells me that i like "being busy." this is partially true. i can't sit still for too long. but it's not because i dislike relaxing- it's because stuff HAS to get done.
i know some people say, "welp- there's always tomorrow!" and this is very true, but tomorrow also brings more things that need to be done. & coupled with yesterday's stuff that i never got to- well, geeze.
at times he has a point. like on a sunday evening i'll actually have nothing else left to do & it's only 7. wow. so what do i do? i put in a batch of cookies.
wtf?! why wouldn't i just sit down on the couch instead?
well, i'm not sure. except maybe that i bake those cookies because that's for ME! i love to bake. it relaxes me. cracking eggs & creaming butter. sifting flour & pouring in vanilla. ahhh. nice.
but 2 cookie sheets later i'm over it. i just want to be done already- but i'm commited. cookie dough isn't going to go to waste on my watch.
despite all of the above- i feel like i do a ok job balancing.
if i'm folding clothes & brynn crawls up my leg & reaches to be held, i put down the socks & scoop her up. she's more important.
and if i'm on the computer & alex is watching a movie (after brynn has gone to bed) & i hear her say "mamma. sit! sit wif me!"- i immediately get up & go sit with her. wether it be for 5 minutes or an hour- doesn't matter. she comes first.
the only thing i really sacrifice is time for myself.
4-5 hours per night = typical.
i'm not one who needs her 8 hours. i function fine on less. i also don't need a coffee or a shower to wake me up.
once i step out of bed- i'm awake.
and my body has an internal alarm clock- so even on the rare weekend day where brynn sleeps in- i'm still up at 6.
my eyes open despite my weary body's protests & i simply cannot re-close them. it's time to get this day started.
lately i've been stressing slightly. i have a lot to do within the next few weeks.
wedding cupcakes to make. a 2 year old's birthday party to plan. photo shoots. a full weekend without the husband (as he'll be off doing his own thing)- then the entire next week off as i prepare to go to NY for a dear friend's wedding & fret about leaving the girls for 3 days.
then back home. more photoshoots. more editing. work. blah blah blah.
but i can do it. right? and on only 3 hours sleep. i'll survive.
and as busy as i am i have to admit that i love almost everything i have to do.
i love taking pictures (though i dislike editing. i so need to hire someone to do that for me.)
i love cooking & baking.
i love seeing people's eyes light up when i deliver a cake.
i love hearing people tell me how good something tastes.
i love the finished product of a party planned for weeks.
those things make me happy. and i can get them all done- because i guess i sort of am a supermom. like every other mom. and dad.
but a week's vacation in the tropics sounds pretty good too. i'd be down with that.
so- are you busy? wicked busy? how do you do it? do you feel like you're doing too much? how to you unwind & how do you balance it all? what do you do for yourself?