one: to the happy parents. yay for babies!
two: to KB for not being pregnant anymore...& delivering the baby herself. in the car. like a boss.
yes. you read that right. & "omg wtf?!" is an appropriate response.
i was waiting for baby news so when i saw a text from KB i was like- hooray! but then i read said text & was like- dude. what?!
so let's break this down:
- she's in the car
- the baby says, "yo. i want out. now."
- she had to break the sac of water
- deliver the baby
- then deliver the afterbirth
- whilst taking care of the baby
-...in the car
i read this to the husband who was like, "Good Lord. that woman is a saint."
i concured, & then pondered aloud if this means she's technically a doctor now. & if so, does that mean she needs a significant raise?
she may be overqualified now. just sayin.
after i determined that all was well i couldn't help but ask about the state of the car. i mean, hello- you just had a baby in your car. that can't be pretty.
she quickly informed me that it was her sister's car (dude- i think someone is getting a good Christmas present this year) & that yes- a hardcore detailing is in order.
i'm imagining the conversation that would accompany dropping the car off:
"ok- so you need a full internal detail?"
"yes."
"anything specific you want us to focus on?"
"preferably the backseat."
"ok- any particular reason?"
"...well we had a baby back there. so if you could just make sure to get out all the blood & amniotic fluid, that'd be great!"
"...come again?"
so glad i'm not in the car detailing business.
so once again- congrats to the new parents & KB.
i promise there won't be 2+ weeks of un-folded laundry on your return.
promise.